Introduction
Chapel Library has just published a booklet by A. N. Martin in collaboration with other pastors. It is a manual for a Christian wedding conducted at a church building with a pastor presiding. It advocates thinking of this as a service of public worship which should validate and illustrate the Gospel and present no stumbling blocks to attendees. This manual addresses some very practical issues like a bride’s vow to submit to her husband, a requirement of modest wedding apparel, and cautions about drinking and dancing at the reception.
The need for this manual became apparent to the pastors involved when professing Christians showed increasingly more worldliness in connection with wedding celebrations than in years past. Now this booklet can help pastors and couples avoid misunderstandings and problems by their agreeing beforehand about the matters addressed.
Having suffered criticism for these views and practices, the author includes a postscript about legalism which is helpful in a much wider sphere of Christian casuistry. In appreciation, we summarize below.
Summary
“Legalism” is a perfectly good term as long as we use it to identify several attitudes and practices condemned in the Bible.
1. Basing acceptance with God on one’s own performance is legalism.
The Pharisee in Luke 18-9-14 shows himself to be a wicked legalist because he placed confidence in his moralistic omissions and religious performances for acceptance with God. The standards of this manual should not be considered in that way at all. A Christian’s acceptance with God is based on the perfect life and substitutionary death of our Lord Jesus Christ (Phil 3.7-9). Adopting or rejecting the standards of this manual will not contribute or detract from your standing before God as a justified man or woman. To suggest otherwise would indeed be a crass form of legalism.
2. Adding the traditions of men to the clear precepts of the Word of God as morally binding ethical norms is also an example of legalism.
Our Lord sharply condemns this sin in Matthew 15.3-9. However, His teaching does not preclude pastors from striving to protect the integrity and consistency of the Gospel ministry by coordinating events like church wedding ceremonies so they are consistent with the highest biblical norms. To brand this as legalism does not recognize that people reasonably assume that the officiating pastor—Christ’s representative—approves of what is said, done, and worn on that occasion.
Attendees also have a right to assume that what they see is the fruit of the Gospel preached each Lord’s Day. Faithful pastors strive to be and produce the salt and light of Jesus’ followers in a fallen world.
3. Passionate, careful, even meticulous, and universal obedience to God in every detail of life is wrongly called legalism and legalistic.
God calls us to glorify Him in every particular of our lives (1 Cor 10.31), but this provokes charges of “legalism” from many professing Christians along with a plea for “Christian liberty”—another example of commonly-abused terminology.
The Gospel, “the power of God unto salvation” (Rom 1.16), delivers us from a life-dominating desire to be “conformed to this world” in every area of life with respect to spiritual and moral considerations (Rom 12.1-2). This certainly includes such momentous events as wedding celebrations, where all should desire to bring as much glory to Christ as is humanly possible and judicious (e.g., reasonably-brief preaching), to maintain sensitivity and decorum that precludes any occasion of moral stumbling, and to avoid everything that might grieve the hearts of the most godly. This is not legalism but godly love in action! Remember the principles of 1 Corinthians 13.5, Romans 13.10, and Galatians 5.13.
Scripture charges pastors to insist on good behavior in the house of God (1 Tim 3.14-15). This includes modest attire (1 Tim 2.9-10). The present ungodly culture manifests a seared conscience regarding the divine institution of marriage, specifically assigned roles within marriage, modesty of dress, and propriety of language. Pastors have the responsibility and sacred privilege to inform and shape the consciences of their flock by careful and responsible exposition of the relevant portions of the Word of God which address these things, and to make specific, judicious, and warranted applications of the same when working with a Christian couple in planning their wedding. Scripture has been given us not only for teaching, but also for reproof, correction, and disciplined training in righteousness (2 Tim 3.16-17).
We recognize a rich variety of legitimate cultural and ecclesiastical traditions connected with Christian weddings. As long there is no violation of scriptural norms, these can be incorporated and become channels of God’s truth and glory in a thoroughly Christian wedding.
An exemplary Christian wedding is a wonderful opportunity to “let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven” (Matt 5.16). May church leaders and engaged couples work together toward this worthy end. Amen.
Adapted by D. Scott Meadows from “The Christian Wedding in a Changing World” by Albert N. Martin